Oh, Michael Steele, You Simply Must Run For President!

This week has been kind of no fun, newswise. Sure, there’s lots of depressing news, enraging news, and outright disgusting news. But where’s the whimsy? The joie de vivre? The silly little giggle-inducers? Man, even Maureen Dowd (always good for a larf) took yesterday off. So, seeing this last night was like an oasis in the midst of an unsnarkable desert: Michael Steele Open To Running For President.

Oh, please, please, pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease let this happen! I don’t ask for much, dear Republican party (unlike fellow bleeding hearts, I wish you no harm or exile), but now I’m pleading with you to nominate this clown to run against Obama! This isn’t just a matter of politics; it’s a matter of good health.

Laughter…may help protect you against a heart attack, according to a recent study by cardiologists at the University of Maryland Medical Center in Baltimore.

See? And, true to the study, reading Steele’s account of his recent dust-up with Rush Limbaugh made my heart happy:

“I’m very introspective about things. I’m a cause-and-effect kind of guy. So if I do something, there’s a reason for it… It may look like a mistake, a gaffe. There is a rationale, there is a logic behind it,” he said. “I want to see what the landscape looks like. I want to see who yells the loudest. I want to know who says they’re with me but really isn’t.”

“It helps me understand my position on the chess board. It helps me understand, where, you know, the enemy camp is and where those who are inside the tent are,” Steele added. “It’s all strategic.”

So, his willingness to pucker-up-and-plant-it-there on Rush’s nether-regions? All part of his grand plan to grace us with his presence forever! Huzzah!!!


1 Response to “Oh, Michael Steele, You Simply Must Run For President!”

  1. 1 Anon
    March 26, 2009 at 12:37

    `President Steele` has an awesome ring to it, too bad the guy is a tool.

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